The Word on Nerds

There have been many questions lately on why us nerds obsess over something stupid and not even real.  To those people asking those questions: it is not any different from the things you obsess over.  Many of you obsess over fictional things as well. Whether its following a sports team, being on Team Jacob or Team Edward or simply following a celebrity, we all obsess over something. None of things affect our personal life, yet we all enjoy following them. Just for us nerds those things happen to be less mainstream. Yet for some reason, people still do not understand why we have "fan-gasms,"a word used by my friend to describe an obsessive fan freak-out. So, I am writing this to inform all of you non-nerds on why we are the way we are.

The first thing you need to know is that the word nerd covers a wide range of people, who classify themselves as nerd, geek, dork, etc. You can have your Social Modern Nerd, who obsess over newer geeky things such as Sherlock, Doctor Who, Marvel, Big Bang Theory, and new animated movies. You can also have your Book Worms, who will constantly read and are always the first in line to get the newly published book by their favorite author.  There are also Computer Geeks, those who know almost anything thing about computers and spend most of their time writing programs on them (they will be the ones running the world as we head further into the digital age). You have Otaku Nerds, who obsess over Japanese culture and anime. There are the Video Game Nerds, who play video games non-stop, enjoy hacking the game console network, finding cheats, and obsess over any type of video game (the most popular among my friends is Portal!). You have your Old School Nerds, the ones who are stuck in their basement playing Dungeons & Dragons with no social life (almost no one anymore falls under this category anymore, nerds are actually quite social). Most of us fall into more than one of these categories, but none of us are in all of them. No two nerds are the same, despite what you might think.

However, until you understand what it is like to be a part of a fandom (to the non-nerds that means fan group) or at least recognize that you are probably already in one, you will never understand us. Once you do, you will understand why we get mad at Steven Moffat for creating plot twists and cliffhangers that piss us off to no end.You will finally know why we get into heated arguments on why Mark Ruffalo was a better Hulk or why Star Trek: Next Generation is better then the original series (I have a death wish in the minds of some people just for saying that). You will understand why we get annoyed when people ruin movies for us. (Thanks Michael, I totally wanted to know who Benedict Cumberbatch's character in Star Trek was!) You will start to understand why we throw books at the wall because the author makes our favorite characters life hell (cough, cough John Green). You will start to understand why we camp out at movie theaters to be the first in line for the midnight premiers for movies even if it makes us insanely tired the next day (I apologize to my English. Iron Man 3 is really good and totally worth pulling an all-nighter for). The first step to understanding us is to realize you will never understand us fully, until you recognize how you are like us.

We definitely have it well as a social group, too. When we meet other nerds, instead of fighting, we obsess together.  Following these things gives us some common ground with other people all over the world. You can find us talking to them on Tumblr all the time about the stuff we enjoy.  I have a few friends in Tennessee, one in Virginia, a couple in New York, all just solely based on the fact that we are in the same fandom. It lets us connect with other people. Obsessing over different things is a fun way to let us escape from our problems.  We choose to embrace our obsessions by going to conventions and premiers.  Its a lot of fun to cosplay (non-nerds: it means to dress up as characters) at conventions. When we cosplay, it makes it easier to meet others we never knew before that have the same interests as us. It is just a social thing we like to participate in.

We have some of the best and most ridiculously fun debates ever. Even when we are in die-hard arguments, we all walk away from it still friends with everyone and relativity unaffected by the argument. One thing that is pretty common between all nerds is that we LOVE being right, and we get into some hard core discussions  trying to prove our opinion is correct even though that is not technically possible.  If you do classify yourself as a nerd, you are probably yelling at your computer screen right now saying that of course your opinion is the right one and that it is possible to prove correct. If the world is going to end, it will most likely not be from atomic warfare or a zombie infestation, but because someone at Comic Con ignorantly asked who the best super hero was.

In my experience,  nerds are some of the most confident, out going, if not slightly insane people, I have ever met.  They enjoy doing some of the craziest and most fun things ever. If you have never participated in a slow-motion lightsaber battle or jumped into a random person's bush trying to hide from the "cops" in Fugitive, you are really missing out. Trust me when I say that the image of the Old School Nerd you have in your head of us couldn't be further from the truth.

Talk To People You Like, Avoid Those You Don't

Lately, there have been a couple people in my life whom have gone out of their way to be cruel to me.  I don't really talk to them and I don't hang out with them.  To them I have a question: Why are you making me so important in your life? Why are you wasting your energy to try to put me down? It's just sad and pathetic.  It's not like I truly care, but it's rather irritating.  If you don't like me that's fine, just go somewhere else.  You are coming up to me, and I don't understand why.  Why are you bothering with someone you don't like?  Get over yourself.  It's not like trying to terrorize me is actually going to do you any good. Go get a life, and hang out with the people you do like, instead of following and insulting those you don't.

People Addicted to Statistics

I was recently chatting with one of my classmates and she told me that one of her pet peeves about people is that they base their life of of statistics.  I agree.  There are a decent amount of people who do this now a days. They claim things like "Oh my parent's an alcoholic, so most likely I will be one, too.  I may just not fight it and be one also."   Or the say things possibly less extreme like, "We lose to them every year. We may as well give up now, and forfeit."  To these people I have to say: you are not a statistic.  You are a human being and you have the power to change what happens to you.  You are not being forced to follow the path of the statistic.  All they state is what is common in that subject area. Everyone is different, so maybe you aren't the common one.  Nobody is tying you to a chair, and forcing you to become an alcoholic or to lose the game.  87% of statistics are made up anyways, right? Why on Earth would you base your life off of something like that? You have the power to change your future. Don't follow statistics. They are just pathetic excuses for not trying. Live a happy life, but realize that it takes effort.  If you are going to ignore this post and continue to base your life off of statistics. at least, keep it to yourself and don't parade it around in everyone faces. 

Suicide Will Never be the Right Answer

Suicide has become a popular idea in today's youth for some unknown reason. Is it because teens are more stressed out than they were in past generations, do they just have lower self esteem now, or is it some other unknown reason?  Either way, it has become a huge problem. I recently had a friend, who wishing to remain anonymous, just attempted suicide. I want to make this post specifically out to you.   Suicide is never the answer to your problems. Although things are crap now, they will get better. High school will end. You have an amazing future ahead of you. One you are really excited about, too. Why on Earth would you choose to end it?  You would just be giving up any chance at having a better future. Suicide is a permanent  solution to your short term problems. You also state that you want to spare your parents mentality.   Having a child that commits suicide will scar them for the rest of their lives. Committing suicide is a very selfish act. It affects everyone. You would be hurting everyone who cares about you and saddening those who even don't. Please don't commit suicide. It's not the right answer. All you would be doing is turning you life into a statistic in the U.S.A.Today. Is that what you want? I know I don't want your life to become that. I'm really glad you are talking to someone professional. That's a great step towards healing. If you ever get so close to committing suicide again, call me first. I promise I will always answer. If you don't call me, call this number instead. (415)781-0500 It's the Bay Area suicide hot line. They have people 24/7 who are ready to talk to you. I love you and I hate the idea of never getting to see you again. Just don't commit suicide. It's very very bad.

Is lying to protect people's feelings good?

This question has been long pondered by humanity. Many people have had a very hard time trying to decide if they are going to lie or not. Many common examples is when you watch a friend's awful play and the ask you how it is or they ask you how an outfit looks on them. This can be very troubling to many people, because they don't want to hurt their friends feelings nor do they want to lie to them. I believe the best way to do it is be honest, but not cruel. That means you should not flat out lie to them and say "oh the play was wonderful. I would totally come to see it again" or "oh my god you look so awful in that outfit. You look like a blind person picked out you outfit."  What I believe you should do is do something commonly referred to a the complement sandwich. The best way to do this is to start of by saying something you like about said play or outfit like "I really liked this one scene. I found it really funny." or "I really like the style of the top.". This first compliment allows the person to understand that you mean the best to them, because you are also kind to them. The second part of the sandwich is the criticism. This is the critical standpoint were you can tell you friend what you really though of it, such as "The play didn't seem to have much of a plot to it" or "the top is really just unflattering on you though."  This part allows your friend to understand  what you really think of what they are asking about. The last part of this sandwich is the suggested way to fix it. This means that you should suggest a way to fix the problem, such as saying "you should add in a line to clarify what is going on" or "you should get the top in the next size up because it would fit you better."  This method of giving people criticism allows you to state what you really feel with out your friends feelings getting hurt. Don't feel obligated to lie though.

What is Good Competition?

The ways viewing competition have gone drastically in two directions. The first direction is where the competition means everything to them and if they don't win it they act like the are going to die.  Competing with these people is no fun, because it takes the enjoyment out of the actual competition.  The people who view these competitions this way are normally very cruel to you in the competition and you don't want to be around them because of it.  Also, the people who are this way tend to also act very snooty to others when they don't do as well in the competition or when they mess up.  There is no reason to be snooty and or  cruel to anyone over a competition even if it is your life long passion.  It's just very bad sportsmanship, because the people who are competing in it are most likely just doing it for fun.  The other direction people tend to go in when they view competitions is that it's only for fun and it doesn't really matter.  These people are also no fun to compete against, because they don't try their hardest and they tend to be really passive.  Most people like some competition and if they are competing against or with people who don't care and don't try their hardest they don't have any fun, because when and if they win they want to know they won because they were the best at it and not just the person who didn't care about it.  The people who view competition in either of these ways really don't get the point of competition.  Competition is a fun way to test and compare your abilities against other people and at the same time learning from what they know.  Competition is not a way to prove you are better then anyone else nor is it something that just doesn't matter.  The best way to have fun in a competition is when people view it in a way that says that they care about what they are competing in, but don't think that if they win they will somehow be better then anyone else.  Competitions really need more of these people instead of the other two, so the next time you go to a competition try to be the person who sees what competition is really about.

Gossiping and Talking About Another; What is the Difference?

Even though we are told starting from when we are very young not to gossip, and talking about people behind their backs is bad, we all seem to do it anyways. To all of you people who say that they don't talk about other people, I am sorry to break it to you, but you are just lying.  That could either to be just to yourself to make yourself feel like you are a better person or that could be to someone else to get others to believe you are a better person.  Most likely though, it is actually both of these things. The reason why people talk about others is because they are curious on the information about another person, so you talk about that information with another person.  Even if you are talking bad (or good) about someone, you still are just talking about the information on them.  However, considering no one likes to be talked bad about, modern society has deemed talking about people bad.  Even though everyone says their moral compass points the right way, why is it that where ever I turn I always hear people talking about others? The reason is because despite that what we say about gossiping being bad, our curiosity wins us over and we talk about others with another person to fulfill that desire for the knowledge.  So before you go out again and talk about why talking about other people is bad, remember why they do it and remember that you do it to.  However, I am not saying gossiping is not bad.  Gossiping still does exist and should try to be eliminated as a common thing in our society.  Many people however tend to get gossiping and just talking about another person confused. The best way to eliminate the confusion is to define the two things. When you are just talking bad about someone just to talk bad about someone, this is gossip and you should not be doing it.  If you are talking about another person and you are honestly taking into consideration that the information may not be true, this is not gossip and you should be worried about doing this with another person.